A lot of people have asked me where I came up with the title for my column. Okay, more like four people. Still, they have asked. Nusquam Abscondre. When translated to Latin, it means “Nowhere to hide.” How bleak and morbid, right?
It’s true though. There really is nowhere to hide. From anything, really. Any and every thing you do in your life will affect how the rest of your life plays out, no matter how insignificant. Memory isn’t something you can erase. Once a memory is made, it may never be forgotten. More important than memories, though, are feelings. You cannot hide from your feelings. You can lie, and say that “everything is okay”, but you can’t hide the truth from your self.
So far, this all seems pretty self explanatory. The importance of “Nusquam Abscondre” lies in hiding the significant truths of yourself; Such as your beliefs, and knowledge of your weaknesses. You cannot repress the painful memories of your past, you cannot hide from what you want. If you spend your whole-albeit young-life believing you want to be a writer, and one day you wake up and realize that it isn’t what you want, you can’t hide from that. You cannot hide, and pretend to love the writing class you were in for three years as much as you did when you were writing three pieces a month. You cannot hide from the fear that grips you as you realize “I have no idea what I want from life.” You can’t hide from that, and neither can I.
Now is a really great time for me to explain my title because I’ve recently realized that I’ve been trying to hide. But there really was “Nusquam Abscondre”, nowhere to hide. So I’ve decided to be honest with myself. I still love writing, but I don’t honestly believe that I can make a living out of it. I’ve believed this for a while, but I’ve been trying to hide from it. I’m going to stop hiding though, and for now, that means leaving the newspaper.
I’ve really liked being on the newspaper. The staff here is fantastic. Mr. Smith has taught me more about my life and writing than I ever could have learned on my own. Even though there aren’t a ton of folks who read my column, I’ve always enjoyed writing it. It’s been a release for me, and this year, it has been a place where I could experiment with new writing styles. I loved knowing that at least a few people were reading my words, and I’m going to miss hearing “Loved your article Izzy!” Even if people didn’t actually like my articles, they lied and said they did. That’s a pretty good feeling.
I feel kind of pretentious, writing a goodbye column. It’s fun to write, and a little sad, but I still feel like I’m being arrogant. Let’s not call this a farewell column, but a last insight into Izzy’s ideas; one last reminder that there is Nusquam Abscondre, nowhere to hide.
Honestly, if you take anything away from anything I’ve ever written for this paper, let it be this: You are you for a reason. Don’t ruin that by hiding from yourself.
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